All gamer has a tale of the worst biz they ever played.
Information technology may have been the utterly catastrophic sequel to a a great deal-loved classic, a rushed linkup with a favourite flic, Beaver State an experimental bran-new release from a favourite studio. But we've all had that here and now of excitedly unwrapping the box, shoving the disk (or cartridge) into the car and then ... then comes the horrific realisation that you have wasted £45 on the interactive equivalent of a late-career M. Night Shyamalan movie.
To create this list, quatern veteran game writers gathered unitedly to live over our own experiences of this bowel-wrenching phenomenon. Our criteria were acerose. As hundreds of games are released every year, there are certainly thousands of unmitigated digital disasters that very few people have had to suffer because they sank quicker than a pair of solid-iron water wings. We've ignored those.
Instead, we've gone for both the absolute legends of gaming miserableness and, more controversially, the titles that promised the moon on a stick, but cruelly delivered a deflated football game along a rusty metal shard – which then gave you tetanus.
Erm ... love?
50 Cent: Bulletproof (Multiple formats, 2005)
Released at the height of the knocker's celebrity, Bulletproof is a violent third-person shooter in which a shirtless Fiddy swears and murders his way around a serial publication of gritty urban environments on a ludicrous pursuance for vengeance (accompanied by Eminem, Dr Dre, and G-Unit, naturally). Clumsy, linear, and – thanks to a lack of any kinda auto-aim – overly difficult, Incontestable is a woefully taxon, decisively dumb shooter with incongruously lucullan production values. Sequel 50 Cent: Blood along the George Sand was, however, surprisingly decent.
Aliens Colonial Marines (PC/PS3/Xbox 360, 2013)
The only game in past memory considered so bad that it inspired a lawsuit from disgruntled players (incensed by the disparity between the pre-departure marketing materials and the grim reality of the finished product) Body Marines was widely considered a burnt-out and derivative first-mortal hitman*. Although Gearbox got the visual style of the movies just right, consulting with Ridley Scott during development, the ending result is a bug-ridden mess. As Eurogamer put it: "For a gritty all about exterminating bugs, it's a fatal irony."
*Note: at the time, the Guardian's reviewer disagreed with this assessment, and thoroughly enjoyed the game.
Bad Street Brawler (NES, 1989)
Ane of solely two games specifically designed for the NES Magnate Boxing glove controller – and five seconds with this agonising brawler will tell you why. The frien is "past punk" Duke Davis who is immediately somehow cursed to patrol a city park, beating up circus midgets and bulldogs. The player had just three moves available: punch, kick and return game to shop. The limited interaction was the fault of Nintendo's buggy glove gadget, which was awful as a controller but marginally better A the star of classic movies such as The Champion and Freddy's Exanimate: The Final Nightmare.
Big Rigs: Terminated the Itinerant Racing (PC,2003)
Hailed as "blatantly unfinished" by the gambling press, Big Rigs was a truck racing sim in which players had to haul cargo across the US, avoiding the cops and out-hurrying information processing system controller rivals. Exclude there is no loading, there are no cops and the competitor truck never moves off the starting line. Although the controls are terrible, development studio apartment Heavenly body Pit (which outsourced most of the work to a team in Ukraine) got round this by just non including any collision detection. The overindulge of legend.
BMX XXX (Multiple formats, 2002)
Au fond Dave Mirra's Freestyle BMX, but topless. And bad. Newspaper publisher Acclaim Entertainment was desperate for attention at the time, pulling stunts like asking people to change their name calling to Turok and offering to pay for Shadow Human being themed tombstones. BMX XXX was the low-water mark, part because, unlike most of the other ideas, it actually happened – even if its primitive 3D graphics were unlikely to arouse anything but mocking laughter. Mirra bolted from the project when helium detected the plan and sued to be unbroken stunned of it. "Sex activity sells!" screamed the marketing guys, but this clip they were wrong: it shifted less than 100,000 copies.
Bomberman Act Zero (Xbox 360, 2006)
"How can we update our humour speed-beat series Bomberman for the Xbox 360," asked a Hudson Soft executive at some point in 2005. The answer, sadly, was to take the beautifully cute Nintendo games and put them in a dystopian ulterior of darkness and brushed steel. What's more, the designers saw fit to ruin all the deftly balanced mechanism, impart a bunch of risible lonesome-player modes and, worst of wholly, overlook local multiplayer in favour of online battles. Surprisingly, the servers were not highly populated.
Bubsy 3D (PlayStation, 1996)
First came Super Mario 64, showing how program games could make the jump to 3D. Then came Bubsy, an obnoxious critter, lightsome, falling, and smashing his own teeth out systematic to show the exact opposite. Bubsy was already unity of the more than unpopular mascots of the 16-morsel era – his ti cartoon show could be used as an instrument of torture, and featured the soon to cost really unfortunate catch phrase: "What could Maybe die out wrong?!". This game ready-made him a symbolic representation for technological disaster, with its drunkenly uncorrectable camera and a 3D engine soh underpowered IT could barely render its own failure.
Custer's Revenge (Atari 2600, 1982)
Not merely is this notorious release from Mystique a crude oil and disliked game, information technology is also a crude and unlikeable game in which you play as the historic character General General Custer attempting to violate a native American woman who is tied to a pole. This grim idea is not some screen of commentary happening colonialism, just intended As a spell of titillation, produced under the publisher's "Swedish Erotica" mark alongside other pixellated smu. "I vindicatory don't believe that adults want to defeat rocket ships," said one Mystique exec at the sentence. A shameful episode.
Daikatana (PC/N64/GameBoy Color, 2000)
This long-held up shooter managed to upset gamers before IT had even been free thanks to a magazine advert in which designer John Romero (co-creator of Day of reckoning) secure to "make you his bitch". He has since apologised, but after a troubled development, the spunky was met with a chorus of negative reviews. Speechless AI companions, limited saves per level, and dated technical school were among the biggest complaints. Observance your sidekicks repeatedly get crushed away doors or digress without aim into your dividing line of discharge was displeasing, especially since their dying meant an instant game over.
Duke Nukem Forever (Multiple formats, 2011)
The fourth style therein classical shooter serial famously spent a whole generation wandering in development Scheol, notching up 12 successive appearances in Connected's annual Vaporware Awards. When it did arrive, good manners of a rescue play by Gear case Software, information technology was awful – a brainless, poorly planned linear shooter tied to a senseless, terminally humorless book filled with idiotic one-liners and datable pop cultivation references. Such like its macho hero, it felt like a humiliating relic from the onetime.
ET the Extra Terrestrial (Atari 2600, 1982)
Yes, this is the lame that failed sol spectacularly that tens of thousand of unsold copies had to be buried in the desert at Alamogordo, New Mexico. Sure, designer Howard Scott Warshaw deserves a die: he was given just six weeks to program the thing thanks to a foolhardy deal struck between Steve Ross, chairman of Atari's raise companion Warner Communications, and Steven Spielberg, who sold the game rights to his film for $25 million. 5 million copies were shipped to retailers in time for Christmas 1982, but word soon got out that ET had very much phoned this one in. The disaster was so large, it contributed to the legendary video gamey crash of 1983. Oops.
The Guy Halt (Multiple formats, 2004)
Questions in that salacious small beer "game" by and large involved shot the answers given by girls on their spring breakout – World Health Organization would then slow strip off. So basically Crime syndicate Fortunes for pervs. Too stinky for this misogynist paradise that one of the featured contestants was underage. Consequently, a judge ordered for IT to personify remote from shelves and the woman sued developer Topheavy Studios with the lawsuit, reportedly stating: "(The) complainant is still a teenager and wishes to attend college, train her career and glucinium active in her community and church."
Hatred (PC, 2022)
Dark, bloody, furious and very, really boring, Hate longed to be hated, to be held ahead arsenic an example of everything wrong with games – but really, all it stands for is how unspeakably dull most attention-grabbing games are. The horror Oregon amusement of rampaging around a metropolis murdering everyone you fitting lasts for some half A level, subsequently which all that's left is a matching stick hitman where information technology's hard to even wee impossible your carnage amid the gothic swarthiness. Nihilistic delusion has ne'er been less rewarding.
Haze (PS3, 2008)
Billed as a rival to Bungie's ERA-defining Halo: Combat Evolved, Haze earned its plug through an impressive heritage. The game was directed by David Doak, the Northern Irish designer who worked on Rare's seminal shooters Goldeneye 007 and Perfect Dark before founding Radical Design and fashioning Timesplitters. The concept is interesting besides, with players subject to the psychoactive effects of a quad-age stimulant. But Haze proved a hollow disappointment. The plot was heavy, the characters laughable and the single role player campaign judderingly momentary. At that place are rumours it was hurried out untimely aside the publishing house – a good shame to those pulled in by the "Halo meets Apocalypse Now" premise.
Hotel Mario (CDI, 1994)
Nintendo doesn't oft let others play with its toys and this disastrous partnership with Philips Interactive Media shows exactly why. Hotel Mario is a horrific attempt to cash happening the full-motion video capabilities of the useless CDi console, marrying a weird door-closing puzzle game with terrible alive cold shoulder-scenes. And it wasn't alone, there were also ternary Legend of Zelda titles too, and these were just as bad (although notable for in reality allowing the appellative Zelda character to give birth an active role). Needless to say, Nintendo doesn't care to discourse some of them – except perhaps during expensive therapy sessions.
Videogame Stars Have Fans, Fortunes㣢¬"and Utterly Baffled Parents
Source: https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2015/oct/15/30-worst-video-games-of-all-time-part-one
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